MICHELE, UMAMING 'DI KINAYA ANG MGA NATUKLASAN SA MISS U KAYA NILAYASAN
ni Ronalyn Seminiano Reonico | November 3, 2020
Nagsalita na si Miss Universe Philippines 2nd Runner-Up Michele Gumabao tungkol sa naganap na kontrobersiyal na coronation ng Miss Universe Philippines 2020.
Sa kanyang Instagram account, post ni Michele, “I heard things I never should have heard, witnessed things I never should have witnessed as a candidate.
“I’ve been so used to empowering others and speaking up for others but at a time when I want to fight and speak up for myself am not allowed.
“This is the first time in my life I feel so powerless. People have been asking me why I left, before leaving, I expressed my feelings and told my reasons to the organization and they understood. I congratulated our winner and after that I thought I could go home to my family, have some time to rest and be by myself and everything would be okay, but then everyone online started making stories, thinking they know me, thinking they know what really happened. I am speaking up now and defending myself because I know no one will. This is my statement, this is my story, this is my message for all of you.”
Nag-vlog din si Michele tungkol dito kung saan aniya “I am fighting for my story. I’m fighting for my experiences because people have been trying to taint my name and drag me down so many issues that are not real and didn’t happen. I’m not sharing all this to attack anyone or to hurt anyone.”
Aniya, ilang araw bago ang pageant ay sumailalim ang buong team niya sa COVID-19 testing at nag-stay sa kanyang bahay sa Manila upang makapaghanda na rin sa event.
Kuwento pa ni Michelle, noong October 11, sa sobrang dami ng mga pinagkakaabalahan niya katulad ng preparasyon sa pageant at iba pang trabaho na naging dahilan ng sobrang kapaguran niya ay nahimatay siya.
Aniya, “That day, I woke up, and as I took my first steps, I passed out and I collapsed.”
Kuwento pa ni Michele, tatlong araw bago sila nag-check-in sa Baguio kung saan ginanap ang event, “I cut my head, I sprained my knee, I broke my toe. It was all very challenging, because as a beauty queen, you have to walk in high heels, you have to look your best, your face has to be presentable at all times.
“It was depressing for me, it was devastating for me. I spent the whole day in bed. I didn’t know what to do. I decided to do my rehab at home, and to do whatever I could at home, I sought professional help.”
Aniya pa, “More than the pain, more than the struggle these past few weeks, it was more of the schedule that we really had to keep up with that gave me so much pressure, and that gave me… That was difficult for me.
“I was prepared to do things on my own, but I wasn’t prepared for schedules being so delayed, days wherein we weren’t able to eat because of our hectic schedules that we had to really keep up with. There were days when we were kept in our rooms not knowing why, and we were just there in our rooms.
“Those little things all built up at the end. The anxiety, all the pressure, the exhaustion… It was a lot to handle.”
Sa kabila naman daw nito ay masaya rin si Michele sa naging samahan nila ng iba pang mga kandidata pero aniya, 3 AM noong October 25, “I heard things that I wasn’t supposed to hear.”
“It hurt. I must admit, I went back to my room, and I cried so hard. All these questions just came back to my head – everything that I’ve been hearing for the past two days just came rushing in my head.
“I was heartbroken. I was devastated that night. I called my family and I wanted to go home. My car was waiting outside, and I could have gone home. But they told me to think about it, that whatever I decide, they would support me a hundred percent. They told me to pray."
Hindi naman sinabi ni Michele kung ano ang narinig niya.
Bukod sa kanyang pamilya, sa tulong din umano ng isa pang kandidata, nagpatuloy siya sa kanyang laban.
Patuloy niya, “I put on my makeup, I got dressed, I smiled, I looked pretty and went down, deliberately when it was already long gown. The top 16 was already walking for their long gown.
“I knew that not so long, we would crown the winner and everything will be over, and I would be able to go home. I went down, and for one last time, I told myself to smile for the show, for the cameras.
“News of the winner already leaked online, because the streaming, I think, it was more advanced than ours. But when I got down, I saw that our feed was so delayed, and it was only part of the announcement of the top 16.
“So many people came to me and was hugging me. A lot of tears happening around. So many questions of why, how, what overwhelming me too much.
“After knowing what I knew the past two days, everything just came crashing down on me. I couldn’t handle it. I admit, I wasn’t strong enough to handle that at that moment.
“I knew I was going to break down, and I didn’t want to do that in front of the cameras.”
Sa pictorial ng top five candidates, naging usap-usapan si Michele dahil wala siya roon.
Aniya, “I told them that I really want to leave. Can we please fast-forward the feed? Because they already announced online who the winner was.
“They said they can’t, because we have to finish the feed and we’re filming. I said, ‘I can’t do this. Can we please just finish?’ And they told me they had to take the picture, and I said, ‘Can we just do it now?’ And they said they couldn’t. I said, ‘I’m sorry, I had to leave.’ And I left.”
Ikinalulungkot din ni Michele na napakaraming bashers online ang nagbigay-kulay sa pageant pictorial.
Aniya, “What saddens me the most is that when people were making issues about me leaving and not being part of that photo, the organization knew why. They knew my reasons, they knew I left. But they never said anything. They kept quiet.”
Saad pa ni Michele, “There were things that I shouldn’t have heard, I hope never heard them.
“Accepting failure is one thing, but for it to be mixed up with so much doubt, so much uncertainty towards myself as a human being, as a woman, that was something that I needed time to process, and I needed time to accept.
“I know I’m strong, I know I’m confident, I know I’m empowered, but at that moment, I doubted everything, I doubted how I was. I wasn’t used to that. I panicked. I did what I had to do, and I do not regret any decision that I ever made in this pageant. I do not regret joining, being part of it, I do not regret leaving.”
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